Let’s be honest, my track record with online dating hasn’t been great. So, I’ve definitely decided that getting a date the old-fashioned way may be for me. Now, I’m sure you’re thinking that women making the first move isn’t very old-fashioned. However, I would disagree with you. In Victorian times, the women would bat their eyes at a potential suitor or perhaps drop their handkerchief. This gave the guy a chance to talk to her. I think the same can be applied to modern dating.
So, I know that I primarily write for women, but men, I think you can learn something from this too! Honestly, I think these tips can be versatile and swapped out for any pronouns you wish!
How To Get A Date The Old-Fashioned Way
Expand Your Friend Group
I would say that a lot of people meet other people through their friends. Personally, my main group of friends are other women. However, I know that in the past, I’ve met guys because I’ve had guy friends. Although nothing really came of that, it does and can happen. Dating is really like a game where everything is just trying to match up. So, be open to new people coming in your life.
As mentioned in a previous post, there are a lot of places to meet people the old-fashioned way. For example, hobbies such as pottery, gymnastics, salsa dancing could be a good place to find singles. (Make sure to check out the post for more suggestions). Ultimately, being friendly and creating conversation is a good stepping stone. If you feel a good connection, perhaps ask to meet up outside of the hobby or place you’ve met this person.
I love this one because I think it’s something that we’ve forgotten to do. I think many of us don’t really pay attention. We may be on our phones or talking with our friends. So, we flock to Tinder or Bumble because there’s a perception that finding people to meet is a bit challenging in person. I don’t think this true and ultimately, we just need to pay attention because there are people all around us.
If you’re in need of an example, check this out!
A: Hey sorry to bother you but do you know how to get to X cafe?
B: Sure! It’s two blocks down and to the right!
Alt B: No, I don’t. Sorry!
A: Thanks! (maybe take a couple of steps in the right direction and then come back) Hey, are you busy by any chance? Would you like to get a coffee or something with me?
Alt A: Thanks anyway! Well hey, are you busy by any chance? Would you like to get a coffee or something with me?
I know this may seem scary, but don’t be afraid of rejection. I’m sure the more you do it, the more you’ll feel comfortable with taking this approach.
Start A Conversation
Last but not least, as a continuation from the last point, one crucial way to get a date the old-fashioned way is to start a conversation. You don’t even have to do small talk most of the time. One time I was with a group of friends at an alumni function and we politely asked this cute stranger if he would take a picture of us. After he took the picture, I thanked him and asked him what his name was. We ended up hanging out with him at a bar. He was interested in one of our friends, but it was still a neat way to meet. Sometimes you don’t even have to ask anything because a simple hello at a party may be enough!
Question of the day: How do you feel about getting a date the old fashioned way?
As always, if you like these types of posts or if you are looking for more pieces that will make you think, click here.