I’m pretty single. No, I’m very single and there’s nothing really wrong with that. Sure, I may see couples all the time and write blog posts about why relationships are a waste of time, but I’m totally not jealous. Why would I be? In all seriousness, being single has its ups and downs and I would be lying if I said that I don’t crave to be in a relationship sometimes. However, most of the time it just doesn’t work out for me. Either I’m too picky or the other person is emotionally unavailable. But mainly what happens is that I’m the girl who likes the guy who likes someone else.
When I was in high school, I went through a couple of crushes. Nothing serious but these cute puppy dog crushes did exist. The first time I remember being the girl who likes the guy who likes someone else was when I had a crush on this guy in my biology class. I didn’t think he was super attractive but he always made me laugh and I gravitated towards him. However, he had someone else in mind and they ended up officially “going out”. So, that was the end of that.
I then developed feelings for a guy friend at the time. We actually ended up being best friends, which didn’t help the situation because he liked almost all of my friends except me. I do have to say that when he did get around to liking me, it was a bit too late and I was way less than nice to voice my opinions. So, that was the end of our friendship and we both moved on.
After that, I had an emotionally unavailable “boyfriend”. The truth is he was never my boyfriend and we were doing this whole long distance thing. It was weird but I was so head over heels for this guy that I completely ignored all the times he would talk about missing his ex. I’m rolling my eyes now, but his ex was in a relationship and lived far away from him. I didn’t think anything of it. He eventually disappeared and life moved on yet again.
Fast forward halfway through college and I meet a guy while we were in Italy. I thought that maybe there could be something there. Who knows! Well, when we got back to New York and we went out for drinks, halfway through our conversation he mentioned that he was going to see a film screening with his girlfriend. This guy didn’t have any pictures with a girl on social media nor did he ever mention a girlfriend in the past. I choked on my drink and that was the last time I saw him.
The last guy, who I wrote my ghosting story on, was a bit different. He seemed really into me at first. He always texted, opened doors for me, held my hand. He was a total gentleman, but he ghosted me and then a few weeks maybe a month later, he was “in a relationship” with another girl.
So, do I have bad luck? Maybe! But I think I learned something from every one of this experiences and that is to take everything with a grain of salt. Coming from the girl who likes the guy who likes someone else, being single is just about the safest thing for us. Now, I don’t think I’ll be single forever. I believe that the right guy will come along and that’ll be the right relationship that I’m looking for. Until then, I’m going to enjoy this time and work on improving myself and my life.
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Question of the day: Are you the girl who likes the guy who likes someone else?
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Yes I totally agree on taking time to yourself! I was definitely that girl who liked someone who liked someone else, and it was so painful. My ex dumped me because he actually liked someone else the whole time we were dating! He was such a jerk, but now I am happily married with the love of my life so it all worked out in the end.
Hi Lizzie! I’m so sorry that happened to you but I’m glad you’re happily married now! It can be a really painful situation but I think we definitely can learn from it, take time for ourselves, and move on to better things. Thank you so much for reading!