I get some wild ideas to talk about, but dating advice, woes, and upsets seem to be my thing lately. While on StumbleUpon looking for something to read, I came across this Jezebel article and I braced myself for controversy. It was a response piece to an article that is no longer up to the effect of, “Being A Good Girl Makes You A Unicorn”. Someone has reposted it on Tumblr, so if you’re curious to know the total situation, check it out here. It is written by a man who thinks female sexuality is a sin and that good girls don’t exist.
Related: Why Dating Has Always Sucked
So, why do I care about this? Well, I’ve always considered myself a “good girl”. I’ve always listened to my family, never stayed out late at night when I was in high school, and very rarely did I get into trouble. I always joke about being a unicorn in the sense that I never really had that teenage rebellion phase, and quite frankly I’m a bit old for that now. Nevertheless, people who know me know my opinions and the way I see the world is a bit different.
Creating Value For Yourself
There is nothing wrong with having high value for yourself. I’m not sure if this is a controversial thought as I hate causing controversy. However, I don’t see anything wrong with people holding themselves to high standards. Does this include female purity? I don’t know. Is female purity even a thing? I’m not sure. Every person is different and every person may answer these questions differently. When thinking about this, I don’t know if female purity and being a good girl are even quite the same.
But what exactly is purity?
According to the dictionary, it is freedom from contamination or freedom from immorality.
Then what’s immorality?
Evilness, corruption, dishonesty.
However, we talk about female purity in terms of sexuality, right? The thing is that women are basically doomed in this society. You’re a prude if you don’t give it up and you’re a slut if you do. How horrible is that?
I’m A Good Girl
If you haven’t read my ghosted story, you should! I remember telling the guy that I’m a good girl. Minutes after saying that I thought, “Why am I saying this? What does this even mean?” In that moment, it meant that I wasn’t going to have sex with him. In this context, it perhaps puts sex in the same box as things you do if you want to get in trouble. I’m not sure if it needs to be in that box. This box is essentially corruption. In this sense, if you do engage you’re losing your morality. Of course, I think this is bologna and the guy who wrote the article is definitely creepy for wanting to marry someone who is 18 because they’re still “pure”. Newsflash: no one is completely safe from “corruption” these days.
What we’re getting is just one male perspective here, but it’s a perspective that many women are well aware of. This idea of being a good girl is something we should be for men. This perspective also includes the notion that men are just dogs and when they want to settle down, they’ll go for a good girl. The jury is still out on how I feel about this idea. However, being a good girl doesn’t mean you’re boring either. This guy has got a lot of things wrong in this article.
Just Do You.
What I do know is that I call myself a good girl because I do good things and I’m a good person. Now, whether or not you consider yourself “pure” is a whole other story. However, I am on the team of doing what you want but don’t be reckless. I hold myself to extremely high standards because I’m a perfectionist and I’m picky. This is not a bad thing. And I don’t think there’s anything wrong about doing the exact opposite.
What these two articles seem to come down to is the idea of purity. Look, if you want to classify yourself as being pure, go ahead. If you don’t, that’s fine too. The way I see it, everyone is entitled to calling themselves whatever they want. Everyone is unique, so should we all call ourselves unicorns?The way I see it, everyone is entitled to calling themselves whatever they want. Click To Tweet
Question of the day: Does female purity exist? Is there anything wrong with being a good girl?
What an incredibly complex issue!
As always, if you like these types of posts or if you are looking for more pieces that will make you think, click here.