Learning To Let Go | Post-Grad Life

Letting go is something that I want to be better at this year. I think oftentimes I harbor feelings towards situations and/or people. I hold onto memories of happy times with people I no longer see or talk to. I try to keep the strong ties to these people, even if it’s only from a distance. However, learning to let go is hard. It’s something that I try to avoid sometimes because it means letting go of good memories and of people that I deeply cared for. Social media doesn’t make it any easier.

If you haven’t noticed, I talk about two topics frequently: friends and relationships (more like being ghosted). I think before I took on the label of a post-grad, I didn’t know how different these things would be for me. My world seemingly seems like a static television screen compared to the one I used to live out on social media. Jet-setting and living almost my dream. So I yearn for those things that I don’t have anymore, and that’s tough.

I recently came across a photo of an old friend who is getting married. I don’t talk to this friend anymore but I have friends that do. Although, I’ve let go of that friendship, I found myself feeling very sad. It’s like I want to hold on to them without holding on to them; weird concept, I know. But I realized something as I saw people I recognize in that photo.

I think the more I became entrenched with the social media life, the more I defined friends ticking those boxes.

Learning to let go is most likely less about me and more about the people in my memories. I’m constantly trying to navigate what makes a good friend. Is it someone who calls you when they haven’t heard from you in a while? Or is it someone who comes to see you from long distances? Is it someone who takes pictures with you and tags you in them on Instagram? Or is it someone who makes a huge Facebook post for you on your birthday?

I think the more I became entrenched with the social media life, the more I defined friends ticking those boxes. Friends used to text me all the time. They used to take pictures with me and tag me so everyone knew that we had a good time at that one brunch or that one Halloween party or that one Greek Week event.

I need to learn to let go of the past and look towards the future. And I need to learn to let go and see people for who they are, not what I want them to be.

So learning to let go means that for me, I need to let go of the animosity I have for people. It means I need to let go of the heartache I feel whenever I see a friend in town that doesn’t visit me. I think it’s easy for me to blame myself and say, “maybe I’m the problem”. But I don’t think I do myself any justice in saying just that.

I need to learn to let go of the past and look towards the future. And I need to learn to let go and see people for who they are, not what I want them to be. I need to learn to let go of people and start over, even though that terrifies me. So, this year is the year of learning to let go. What will it be for you?